On having an identity crisis

unnamedThe other day I found myself in a sticky situation. I was at a party, trying to have a conversation and also trying to prevent my toddler from destroying the host’s home, when the question came up “So, what do you do?”

After a beat, I said “I’m a writer.”

Because I am. Well, kind of. I used to be a journalist. I used to listen to police scanners, track down sources and scribble through those tiny spiral notebooks. Now, I write a freelance article here and there. Sometimes. I blog a little, as you might have noticed.

What I should have said is “I keep this human alive” and pointed to my son, who at that moment was entangled in electrical wires and had a raspberry smeared across his cheek.

Being a stay-at-home parent is far more demanding, exhausting and creative than any job I’ve ever had, yet I’m too embarrassed to say “I’m a mom” when asked the inevitable cocktail party question. Maybe I’m embarrassed because it doesn’t require a college degree or maybe I’m embarrassed because women have been doing it for centuries (which is why we’re always quick to applaud stay-at-home fathers). Maybe I’m feeling resistant because Switzerland is a country so in favor of a “traditional home.” Bottom line: I’m having an identity crisis, and it has nothing to do with being an expat.

(Maybe you can help?)

I need to snap out of it, because today I’m doing the most incredible of feats for someone with my job title: I’m flying internationally with a toddler. Just the two of us and a iPad full of Peppa Pig. I’ll report back when I make it to the other side.

Meanwhile, I hope you are having a nice week. Here are a few, fun links for Tuesday:

The coolest hotel in each state

How many Aperol Spritzs can you drink in 24 hours in Naples?

If you send this to the State Department, you can get a back-up passport!

The shoes I always wear on flights

Anthony Bourdain’s legacy: Seeing the world with Cerebral Palsy

Where you’ll find me over the Fourth of July

 

Above photo from A Village in Paris

Advertisements

Posted by

There are California girls and there are Bakersfield girls. I am the latter.

7 thoughts on “On having an identity crisis

  1. I love your blog. I stumbled on it recently. I am also from the west coast (though further north in Canada) and moved to Switzerland last year for my husband’s work. I feel you on the identity shift, I left my job as a teacher. I wanted to comment as I am actually reading this post as I sit in the Zurich airport waiting with my 18 month old daughter to board our international flight. Have a good flight and I look forward to future posts!
    PS Our iPad is full of Peppa Pig and Dora 🙂

    1. Thank you! I love making new expat friends through the comments section! We survived the flight, although he only slept 15 minutes during all nine hours of the flight! I hope you two survived yours as well! Oh and I can highly recommend the app “Peekaboo Barn” for your flight home. Toddlers are crazy about it 🙂

  2. Dear Paige,

    Your job as Mom is one of the most important in the world. To raise happy, well-balanced children in a challenging environment is not easy, and you are doing a fabulous job. Bravo! Good parents help to create a better future for all of us!

    Thank you and do not shy away from the credit you so richly deserve!

    Maryanne

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    1. Dear Maryanne,

      You always say just the right thing. Thank you for these kind words — they mean so much coming from a superwoman and wonderful mother, life yourself. Sending you big hugs!

  3. Paige, there is no greater calling than being a mother. Don’t ever be ashamed of that profession. ​Giving a child a secure emotional base is so very important. And you only get one chance to do that. No, you have chosen well and I would advise you stick with your choice as long as possible. In the long run, you will not regret it.

    Barry Lillie

    On Mon, Jun 25, 2018 at 11:49 PM, Bakersfield Blonde wrote:

    > Bakersfield Blonde posted: “The other day I found myself in a sticky > situation. I was at a party, trying to have a conversation and also trying > to prevent my toddler from destroying the host’s home, when the question > came up “So, what do you do?” After a beat, I said “I’m a writer.” >

  4. Being a mom is an incredible job! I agree that I sometimes yearn for the degrees that are currently gathering dust somewhere, but I feel so lucky that I get to be with my kids full time. And now that they are changing at an ever-quickening pace and time seems to be moving so quickly, I am confident that I am right where I need to be. You are a whole person, well-rounded with lots of facets! Being a mom is one of them, as is being a writer. You are doing a fantastic job and I can’t even being to imagine how much Grant loves having his mama around all the time : ) Big hugs to you xoxo

    1. Thank you Kristina! I’m always in awe of how you’re doing it (times two) and keeping up your “practice” 🙂 I need to find some outlet like yours, so I feel valued somewhere outside of our apartment as well. Maybe something that leaves me with toned arms too! But yes, I love being Grant’s mama and wouldn’t give up this time for anything in the world. This is a profoundly precious time in his life! xoxo

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s